South Beach: like a bad hotels.com commercial

Side boob, bottom boob, bare boob, fake boob, upside down boob. I am in the land of titties and Lamborghinis. And if you know me at all, those 2 things are at the very top of my list. Big Willy was spot on with his 1998 hit "Miami." Last night we started at a bar called Wet Willies. It's like 7 eleven but for raging alcoholics. 20 flavors of slurpies with a majority containing 153 proof grain alcohol. How you like them apples. We went for dinner at Nikki Beach. I give that place 2 thumbs down. Nice establishment, horrible service. Then ended at Red Room where we partied till they closed.

Lounging at the beach at The Shore Club right now. Infinity pools, hot tubs, some sick obsession with outdoor beds, and DJs spinning club music 24/7. Picture a late 90s early 2000s music video.